Yeah, OK, go ahead and take a moment. I did just that today, while having "girl time" with one of my besties at the day spa. We took a dip in the Jaccuzi, got a Swedish massage, lunched on a patio... Sigh. Oh, oops, get back on topic.
While being saddled with a handful of kids, a husband and a mortgage was my ultimate life goal since I was a teenager, there are some serious sacrifices that occurred while I was obtaining them. What are the things I miss most? In no specific order…
1. My money. Or at least, my worry-free, care-free attitude about spending it.
2. My freedom. Vegas this weekend? Um, let me think about it… OK!
3. My flexibility. What does it matter if an emergency comes up at work at the last minute, or if you feel like popping by the gym 11 pm? Does the cat really care what time you drag your sorry carcass home at night?
4. My sleep. I could easily sleep til 11am on a Saturday. Or, until 4pm if I didn’t bother coming home before the sun appeared! (See aforementioned flexibility.)
5. My patience. I never had to scold or yell at a house plant, or want to pull my hair out over something the couch did.
6. My time. I used to be relatively unstructured. I was always at work within the same half hour each morning and I ate breakfast in the car on the way to work. But after that, it was chaos. Lunch, dinner, and the time I left work was MY choice and I was regularly unpredictable. Now my “work” dictates what I do. I get up at 7 am not because an alarm tells me, but when someone cries out for me. We eat breakfast within 45 minutes of waking because if we don’t, our whole day’s schedule is off. The kids each lunch and nap at the same time every day or I suffer for it at night. If I was late somewhere "back in the day," it was simply my fault (even though I am sure I blamed it on traffic). Now, I’m late because some kid throws a tizzy about what she got served for breakfast, or a baby throws up on her outfit and needs to be changed at the last minute.
7. My entertainment choices. I NEVER had to sit through a movie didn’t like, or a TV show I found irritating (Barney!!!) or downright weird (Yo Gabba Gabba, anyone?!)
8. My car. I traded a zippy SUV for a freakin’ swagger wagon. Enuf said.
9. My hair. Most mommies don’t have hair that reaches their waists, which I did by the time I had my kiddos. It’s a matter of pain tolerance. Babies have these incredibly strong fingers which some say they could use to literally hold their own weight with just their fingers, if they had the forethought to know they would fall if they let go. Unless you sport a Little House on the Prairie hair bun 24/7, you will at some point lose your hair to the grabbing hands. My #4 actually ripped out my hair extensions I got as a birthday pick-me-up, when she and I spent the night together. When I woke up and she happily had my hot pink hair stuffed into her little sausage fists.
10. My body. Self explanatory.
But the real question is, am I still heavily mourning the loss of these things, or just occasionally daydreaming about my life way-back-when? I wouldn’t trade what I have now for what I used to have. I doubt many moms would.
This posting was actually just one in a long line of lists that came to mind one day. A fellow blogger and friend over at multiplemama.com posted a blog just yesterday about her single, childless friends which I read about the same time I was compiling this list, and became inspired to finish my own list. Hey, great minds think alike, right? But then I found a link she put inside her blog that sent me here. Apparently, this Mama Kat chick gives challenges to her readers each week to help newbies, like me, hone our craft. Coincidentally, this post is already sort of on topic and it’s just a day late (due to traffic, I am sure!). So what the heck, I’m submitting my homework anyway.
If Mama Kat ever makes it down here to little ole me, she’ll
photo credit: http://www.meltwaterblog.com/wp-content/uploads/2010/02/20-something.jpg